Sunday, December 27, 2009

Naughty & Nice

The old adage that Santa is watching us to see if we are naughty or nice has been coming up for me today as I fill with gratitude for all I was given this Christmas. My inner Santa was quite surprised with all that I received. I thought I was naughty this year. Turns out I was really nice.

Well far be it for me to argue with the fat feller from the north, so I am taking it as a sign that I have been nice. Nice to my fellow man, and really starting to be nice to myself. Part of being nice to myself is acknowledging and owning that I am doing the very best I can in each moment. Sure I have times when I am hard on myself still, but they are becoming less and less. It's doing the things I want to do. When I don't, I don't. I don't have to sit around berating myself for not doing them, I just have to feel how it feels and make new choices. I'm letting go of that old story. I am making strides each day to be gentle with myself, to be nice to myself. In turn I find that I am nicer to those around me. That truly brings me Joy - Joy To The World.

Naughty. Nice. They are both judgments really. How do I feel? How do I feel, that is the question I am asking myself. How do I feel in each moment, about the choices I make. Choices made fresh and new, and being aware of those choices. Conscious choices! They feel so much better than making choices unconsciously, reacting to old hurts, making choices out of habit, choices that help keep my story alive, choices that don't serve my highest good. That doesn't feel so great, so when I ask myself how I feel, I know. Take that feedback in and make new choices.

I do hope that Santa or Papa Hanukkah or Puff 'n Fresh, whoever you celebrate this time of year was good to you. We are all doing the best we can in each moment. Celebrate that! Let go of your story. You know the one, the many, the "reasons" you make choices that don't make you feel GREAT. I know I sure do.

I look forward to 2010. It's the year I turn from Bitter to Happy. Yes Bitter to Sweet sounds much better, but sweet just doesn't resonate as a goal for me. I am walking my walking more and more each day, and 2010 is the next step on my journey.

I'll be checking in this week, gearing up for the New Year, but wanted to say hello tonight from my hometown. Writing in the room I grew up in. A room and a house full of old stories that I am letting go of so I can live a beautiful rich full life in each new moment. The past is exactly where it is suppose to be, in the past. The future, yup, right where it is suppose to be, in the future. Tonight I feel alive. A little sore from my late night fall in the back yard - ouch - I did save the sandwich and most of the milkshake, but my knee and hip took the brunt of the fall. It was a good sandwich.

Love, Light and Laughs to you all,

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