Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Reading The Signs From The Universe

I am seeing signs from the Universe more and more, and I am attempting to make heads or tails of these messages. Some signs are easy to understand, others a bit confusing. I'll share a few, but certainly not all of them, my fingers would cramp if I typed them all. And you my reader would be bored, there’s only so much narcissistic dribble even you my loyal masses can take. Full of myself? For sure. Boring? Never! So here's the highlights:

Idling at a light last week, I let a woman pull out (saintly act), giving a school bus the opportunity to pull in front of me. A NPR (Liberal Prick!) story about how dangerous it is to drive a bus in Guatemala on the radio. The reporter mentions the old Bluebird buses imported from the US at the same time the bus pulls in front of me, yup with Bluebird right smack there on the bumper. Later that day a friends post inspired someone to write Bluebird as a comment. Hmmmmm? Am I suppose to go to Guatemala, I have been putting it out there that I want to visit Central/South America. Or is the Universe saying nice work for letting the woman out in to traffic?

That night I was at home watching Season 4 of "Lost", I had been hearing this new noise in my house. A beep every now and then. This was the second night I heard it, after some investigating I discovered in was my Carbon Monoxide detector telling me his battery is low. I took it down to quiet it. I was half watching "Lost" when the sound starts again, the exact same sound. I know I've pulled the battery from the detector, and I'm freaked. It was on the show. It got Jack out of his office so he could see his dead father waiting for him in the other room. Okay, what does this mean? My Dad saying hello from beyond the grave? I'm going crazy like Jack, or are we? Am I Lost?

This weekend The BS had a lovely out of town visitor, she and I have known each other since back in the day. She mentioned an old classmate of mine, what a great guy he was, hadn’t heard his name in 20 years. Then today, quite literally while I was typing about signs from the Universe he made a friend request on Facebook. I did some inquiring and he had not talked with her, he just saw that she and I were friends and decided to ask. His path is through Jesus Christ, from our brief note exchange I gather his teachings helped him from "all the BS". He also stated I should forget about the signs from the Universe and look for answers in the Lord Jesus Christ. I wish him nothing but the best, and am happy for him, but I'm quite taken with my path (and myself) and have no need to be saved. And to ignore "the BS" would be to ignore myself. A bit freaky in the timing, fuck I might not believe that one if someone told me it. But it's true, the lord does work in mysterious (magical) ways.

I’ve also had a couple of great ones recently regarding what I am doing in this world. They could go under the heading Career, or a bit more dramatic, what is my calling. I'll just say that I do believe I am on the right path and I am trusting. The coffers are a little light, but I am trusting that I am in alignment with what I am meant to be doing. And yes, I am taking the light coffers as a message - Get to Work! It also gave me the opportunity to receive some additional feedback from the Universe.

The whole seeing the signs, synchronistic, serendipitous event triggered The Bitter Spiritualist's brother to chime in – he being an integral part of one of the two magical Career signs. In his beautifully poetic way he was a.) wondering if I had a psychotic break - which I assured him I had had a long time ago, and now was bitter but sane(ish); and b.) pointing out how full of myself I came off as, riding my high horse, infused with the power of The Lord, wondering if I could change water to wine (the wine/water bit was mine 2 cents). It is great that The Bitter Spiritualist is, um, blessed with this outspoken sounding board of a sibling who can kick the BS out of The BS. He's a very smart fellow, and his tongue sometimes makes mine look candy coated. I love him to the tips of my toes. His opinion I value heaps, his wrath I valiantly try to avoid. He is one of my biggest cheerleaders. We are very different and quite the same. I am so grateful for his love, his wisdom, his support and his "Are you fucking insane or just a douchebag?" questioning. He helps The Bitter Spiritualist remain grounded, somewhat humble, and keeps things in perspective. He’s my litmus test, a reminder to know and love (fear?) my audience. Nothing can be force fed to him, he is going to make me work for every bite. So believe me, I am not attempting to choke any of you with my BS, I respect us both far too much to make those attempts. That happens when I get some real power and a can be a true pompous arse - a boy can dream.

Do I think the Universe is talking to me directly? ABSOLUTELY! Do I have a case of the specials, that I am somehow better than anyone else, that I can do the water to wine trick? FUCK NO! I am learning and loving. One man's sign from the Universe is another man's coincidence. And I am making neither man wrong. It's all up for interpretation. I’ve detailed my thoughts about having all the answers in a previous post, The BS Disclaimer. Let’s just say the word fraud is used liberally, better yet read it yourself. God I’m shamelessly plugging my writing in my writing – I am a self involved over inflated fellow, but so very delicious, even with my bitter aftertaste.

I am learning. Learning how to live and love and what my operating system involves. And learning how to read the signs. I’ll take the sign from my old classmate that The Bitter Spiritualist is on the right path and that preachy doesn't work for me. The Bluebirds? Fuck if I know, maybe becoming a Guatemalan School bus driver isn't a good career move. The Smoke Detector? Hello Dad, I love you, I miss you and thanks for saying hello. For now I am going to take them all as a pat on the back, that I am doing what I am suppose to be doing.

Thanks for reading. Maybe there was a sign in this post for you. Definitely a clear sign I've gone off the deep end. (Okay that sign has been hanging for a long time.) A sign that you love The Bitter Spiritualist or you have had enough of this nut jobs malarkey. It's how you read them, what you want to see is what you want to see. I can discount anything I want, or not. I'm choosing to believe there is magic, that the Universe does talk to me. If you don't, I'm not here to judge. Your feedback, comments, heckling, stories, recommendations for a nut house, are most welcome.

Keep your eyes peeled and your heart open. There is magic in this world, you just have to look for it and believe.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009


Numerous accusations have been hurled at The Bitter Spiritualist that he might not be all that bitter. The tabloids have been hounding our home office looking for a response to these outrageous claims. I'm presently meeting with the legal department to sue these people. (It's the American thing to do, and a whole lot easier than getting a job.)

I can see where some of you might read my posts and think that he's not bitter at all. Well truth be told I'm just sparing you some of the bitter taste that is me. It's a flavor best enjoyed alone.

To prove to myself I am bitter I had to look up the word. Sure I am The Bitter Spiritualist, but I'd never looked up the meaning of my name. Before you judge, have you looked up the meaning of your name? I thought not. And if you have, you're a narcissist just like me. We should go for coffee sometime, ignore each other and talk about ourselves. I know I'll be witty, urbane, handsome, charming and humble. I'm sorry were you saying something? Anyway the good people at Websters Online* gave me this:


Function:adjective (GRAMMAR USAGE CORRECT. CHECK.)


Middle English, from Old English biter ; akin to Old High German bittar bitter, Old English bītan to bite — more at bite
Date: before 12th century. (OLD ENGLISH AND GERMAN, TOGETHER AT LAST.)

1 a: being or inducing the one of the four basic taste sensations that is peculiarly acrid, astringent, or disagreeable and suggestive of an infusion of hops — compare salt, sour, sweet b: distasteful or distressing to the mind : galling - a bitter sense of shame ( TO THE DOUBTERS OF MY BITTERNESS UNDER THIS DEFINITION, THERE IS ONLY ONE WAY TO FIND OUT. OPEN WIDE AND SAY AHHHHHHHH, HOPSY SALTY GOODNESS WITH EVERY LICK. GALLING I KNOW.)

2: marked by intensity or severity: a: accompanied by severe pain or suffering (a bitter death) b: being relentlessly determined : vehement (a bitter partisan) c: exhibiting intense animosity (bitter enemies) d (1): harshly reproachful (bitter complaints) (2): marked by cynicism and rancor (bitter contempt) e: intensely unpleasant especially in coldness or rawness -a bitter wind. (UM, YEAH, I'M CONFIDENT I FIT INTO ALL THESES CATEGORIES. IF YOU DISAGREE WITH ANY OF THESE DEFINITIONS, YOU'VE JUST EXPERIENCED THE CANDY COATED GOODNESS I LEARNED AS A LITTE GIRL IN FINISHING SCHOOL, NOT THE FULL BOUQUET THAT IS THE BS. COME ON, INTENSELY UNPLEASANT, HELLO! OKAY "RELENTLESSLY DETERMINED" MAY BE A STRETCH, MORE MILDLY INDIFFERENT.)


Phew. I am still bitter. Thank goodness, I feel better, I mean bitter. Now I can continue with my litigation and writing my original post on GRATITUDE. Stay tuned.......

*The Bitter Spiritualist is not sponsored by the good people at Websters and no I am not paying them for the use of their definition. Same goes for the Bitter Booze pictured, I just lifted the images from Google. If you would like to sponsor The Bitter Spiritualist feel free to email me directly for the address. In addition to being bitter, I can be bought.